There's this new guy at my office, he rides his bike to work.

"My citroen won't start" (lucasboechat)
04/29/2015 at 18:09 • Filed to: None

He smells like wet dog and insists on wearing those colored-lenses Oakley sunglasses inside while wearing a suit. I fucking hate him.

DISCUSSION (27)

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:14

Let me guess.....”duck billed” shoes with no socks, too? Scraggly beard?

ttyymmnn > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:14

You sound jealous.

My citroen won't start > ttyymmnn
04/29/2015 at 18:17

He smells of sour milk.

My citroen won't start > Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast.
04/29/2015 at 18:18

No scraggly beard, normal looking guy but yes on the “duckbilled"shoes.

E92M3 > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:19

Kinja'd!!!

My citroen won't start > E92M3
04/29/2015 at 18:31

Yes, that.

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:46

I knew it would be one of those.... We have a guy like that in our office.

OPPOsaurus WRX > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:50

Is it a fixie?

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:50

I ride my bike to work sometimes... but of course I also *shower* when I get there. And if my work didn’t have showers, I’d get a cheap health club membership nearby and use their showers.

And sunglasses indoors is definitely lame.

Lemme guess... he has all the “correct” coordinated spandex bike riding clothing and a racing bike with ultra thin tires, right?

RockThrillz89 > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 18:51

Tell him to get a damn moped. He can still wear his Oakleys and his little helmet, still hold up traffic and people with things to do, feel superior because he can park in the front of the parking lot, yet won’t smell like sweaty butthole. Plus he can be a lesson to all the kids on their way to school to study hard, work hard and get a car.

My citroen won't start > RockThrillz89
04/29/2015 at 18:54

That’s a very Clarkson-esque way to view the whole thing. I don’t mind him riding a bike to work or have anything against bike riders but this fucker smells, he needs a shower.

My citroen won't start > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
04/29/2015 at 18:55

No, he just rides his bike wearing his suit apparently. And yes, he has a racing bike and he smells bad.

My citroen won't start > OPPOsaurus WRX
04/29/2015 at 18:56

Nah, racing bike.

tromoly > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 19:00

It should be noted that bike has a Coaster Brake, it is NOT a Fixie.

RockThrillz89 > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 19:01

I don’t have anything against people riding their bike’s, except when they are going to be around other people in a professional setting. Unless, like you said, are willing and able to shower when he gets to work. It’s one thing to take a bike if you live a mile or so from work, but if you have to bike so far that you’re sweating sack, it’s time to reconsider. And I hate when people hold up traffic in the mornings. But I live in a town that doesn’t have bike lanes, lots of two lane roads with no good area to pass them with a safe clearance. So a person on a bike will hold up traffic majorly. It’s just inconsiderate. We have parks and plenty of neighbor hoods to ride in and only one or two major roads. Either pick a non rush hour time, or be considerate and pull to the shoulder to let cars pass... Sorry, I’ve started rambling.

desertdog5051 > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 19:35

I did that once. Could not stand my own sweat smell. Not again.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 19:36

Yep... he’s doing it wrong. He bought a fancy racing bike. But the problem with those bikes is they’re terrible in some ways... like having no way to attach a rack which would enable having proper bags attached to the bike, like this one specifically for carrying suits:

http://www.twowheelgear.com/products/commu…

I personally ride a hybrid bike with a rack, full fenders and bags. My bike clothing (right down to socks and underwear) is completely separate from my office clothing.

Though for my next bike, I think I’ll get a touring bike. A touring bike is like a racing bike, but with provisions for adding fenders, racks, etc. They’re also designed to carry more weight without falling apart, while still being good for speed. . Something like this:

Kinja'd!!!

Frank Grimes > My citroen won't start
04/29/2015 at 22:44

what are duck billed shoes. Also I hate this guy too.

duurtlang > My citroen won't start
04/30/2015 at 05:19

I ride a bike to work when I can. I don’t see the problem there at all. But then again, I’m Dutch. We have more bicycles than people and we have the proper infrastructure for bicycles.